Apple has given My Corporate Hell .com a sneak peak at the new Mac Pro G6, the fastest computer in the history of the world.  Introducing the 6 Quad-Core Intel Xeon “Nutzo” processor. “Its single-die, 84-bit architecture makes 32GB of fully shared L3 cache readily available to each of the twelve-processor cores. The result is the fastest access to cache data and greater application performance on 6 - 1TB hard drives in the history of the world,” said Steve Jobs, Apples allusive CEO.

The G6 New Virtual cores.

“The new Intel Xeon “Nutzo” processors support Hyper-Threading, which allows six threads to run simultaneously on each core. So a 12-core Mac Pro presents 72 virtual cores that are recognized by Mac OS XXX “said Jobs. When asked what does that mean to the average consumer, Jobs replied, “I don’t know, but it’s frickin’ cool!”

 

We asked what the starting price for the new machine was and Mr. Jobs replied “The integrated memory controller, along with 68GB of fast 5066MHz DDR3 ECC SDRAM, also gives Mac Pro up to a 50.4x increase in memory bandwidth over previous generations. 50 More bandwidth allows for more data to be fed to the processor faster, helping each core spend its time processing data, not waiting for information to arrive, making it the fastest in the history of the world.” We asked what does that mean to the average consumer, Jobs replied, “I have no idea, but I’m told it’s really, really cool!”

No room for Expansion saves you money

Jobs stated, “The redesigned interior of the new Mac Pro feels like the well-organized workstation it is. You’ll never need anything more than what’s already in the machine. In fact we have designed it so you couldn’t add anything else. Utilizing our C.R.A.M. Design Style we have added everything there is to add.

It’s a rat’s nest of components, so it’s best to stay out. Slide out the processor tray to replace burnt out memory. Slide out hard drive bays to replace burnt out storage.  And with plenty of I/O ports both front and back, you’ll have room for all your external devices. So it’s perfect as is.”

 

Drives, Multicore, Multitasking, Maltese Falcon.

The new G6 has every drive available you could ever want or need. It boasts a DVD Super Drive complete with a copy of the 1941 film The Maltese Falcon (one of Steve’s Picks), Blu-Ray Drive, HD DVD Drive, One Drive that hasn’t been invented yet -- and a cup holder. 

At the heart of the new Mac Pro are six Quad-Core Intel Xeon “Nutzo” processors with an incredible amount of processing power. Optimized for multicore technology, Giant-Super-Lion OS provides powerful tools that make it easy to reap the benefits of the Mac Pro, providing anyone ever creates programs that will run on the new machine.

 

The UNIX is complete.

“The Mac OS XXX Giant-Super-Lion is a powerful operating system - it is a fully certified UNIX foundation. With a rock-solid UNIX infrastructure, it’s one of the most secure and stable operating systems on any platform ever, making this computer the preferred choice of mad scientists bent on world domination. Not that I know any of them personally” said Jobs.

84-bit power, power, power!

“This new computer is so powerful it requires 3 power buttons. The Giant-Super-Lion OS XXX is a perfect match. Since the entire operating system is 84-bit ready, you can take full advantage of the 84-bit architecture of the 6 Quad-Core Intel Xeon “Nutzo” processors inside the new Mac Pro G6. Add to that the 68GB of memory available for the Mac Pro, and the performance of Giant-Super-Lion is even better than anything now or ever,” said the now mad-with-power Jobs. When asked what does that mean to the average consumer, Jobs replied, “I don’t know, but it’s frickin’ cool!”

 

Don’t keep those pixels waiting.

 

Bottom Line

“The bottom line on this is no one will ever need to build or buy another computer for the remainder of time,” said Jobs, “This is the ultimate ever, ever computer thingamabobby ever. Soon this thing will start thinking for itself and then you’re all doomed, doomed I say! You’re all doomed!” Then Jobs disappeared in a puff of smoke.

We met up with Mr. Jobs later that afternoon in the cafeteria and inquired again about the price.

By: Less N. Moore

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